Getting it Flowing Again: Reflections on Guilt, Glue less collage, Percoset, and that Old Creative Feelin

Wow. So it's been awhile since I last posted. Like I think the last things I was talking about here was yogurt and Christmas, not necessarily in that order. So What's happened since then? Well a lot. Both sets of parents visited for Christmas, and then came again a month ago, one set to help take care of me recover from kneee surgery (ripped ACL surgery, which I admittedly made into a life and death issue on Facebook, comparing myself to Frida Kaloh, drama queen as I am) and the other to help us try and buy a new HOUSE, which is crazy considering we only own about one tenth of the bricks in the patio in the front yard of our current tiny house, and this new one is a 5 bedroom on a gorgeous sprawling 2 acres...More about that in a minute. (yes the following picture is a teaser to provoke your interest...so!)

So the parents came, and remarkably they get along, and my mother helped with Piper duty and saved my life in that way in that well, for an entire 2 weeks I actually HAD a life, revolving deliciously around myself and my needs and my healing instead of just Pipers...

...and I feel guilty for even typing it folks (so much so I had to rationalize it by adding "and my healing" to this sentence retroactively to justify myself)but other than the occasional power struggles with said mother-behold the inner teenager reemerges after one week in close proximity with the source of maternal chromosomes, Piper, beware-it was BLISS, yes BLISS...I would have had to eat a lot of flippin yogurt to give myself that deep sense personal satisfaction again...

Ahh...a whole four hours at a time to myself...occasional shooting pain in my knee be damned (well the Percoset helped with both that shooting pain and the sense of bliss I imagine, as well as a pleasantly loose sense of the passing of those 4 hours into something that felt somewhere between 2 hours and eternity)I got to read, make digital collages, jewelery, drink entire cups of coffee in one sitting...it was deluxe to be sure. The only downside was by the time my mom left I was filled with both longing and appricieation for both her past efforts distant and recent in the care of both me and my daughter, and for the kind of time I will not get to myself again till Piper's in college. Or I'm retired, or I'm in a nursing home. whichever comes first.

sigh..Anyway, I made them on this cool app called Pic Collage on my Ipad (they are not paying me to say this, but again, I wish they would)and I have also been making collages for every month of Pipers life on it. Here is the one that I did for last month

at any rate it's super easy to use and feels like a creative effort and sort of like making a real paper collage without the hassel of, you know, glue, and the like. Also you can do free form traditional pictures laying about style ones, like this

which really give you that creative feelin, which has been a little lackin in my life lately, tell ya what. Oh I also made this one other collage using both Pic Collage and another app called Sketchbook Express

also for I-Pad, which is also super awesome and not messy but makes pretty great paint and pen like effects, even airbrush, on and did I mention that it is FREE and so is Pic Collage? Now that is particularly awesome, especially if you are cheap or broke or a bonefied starvin artist (who happens to have an I-pad? I dunno. Maybe you spent all your money just getting the I-pad and are as a result only eating yogurt this month. In that case props to you, nearly starving artist)
Ok I think I am rambling again. And I swear I am not on, nor have I been on for a long while, Percoset, you strange minxy mistress. The Percoset, not you, dear readers, all two of you (hi Mom! Hi Farrah!)

What would we do without our moms and our best friends? And creative outlets occasionally. Just wither up and DIE I tell you. Or resort to drinking heavily. And more Perk. sigh. Ok. Time to sign off.

hope you get inspired to take on some creative project this week.
more on the new house and stuff later
xxx
jess

The Fleeting Bliss of Yogurt and other such Oral Pleasures.

Haven't blogged in awhile, not that I haven't wanted too. I have thought of it often when I got those rare moments where time and space align and getting to sit down and write, or do anything really makes me feel like those ladies on the yogurt commercials where they savor a bite of Danon like it's Ambrosia or their last meal or something.

So a brief rundown on the holidays to catch myself up. Thanksgiving this year was at our lovely midwife Marie's house, and not only did she prepare a scrumptious feast with all the fixins but served it on her mother's china, with candles in the real silver candlesticks freshly polished by my husband.

Piper was at the table and less impressed by the decorative elements than by what we were eating. She was not quite five and a half months old and Marie was asking me if she was showing any interest in food.I said she was and that she'd already had a few tastes of things (including but not limited to her first taste of any food besides plain yogurt, Guiness Beef stew, so shoot me! ). Marie then asked me if she was sitting up, which she wasn't yet, and telling me that meant her digestion probably wasn't ready when I absent mindedly took another bite of sweet potatoes near Pipers face and she grabbed the spoon and did the inevitable stuff in mouth trick that babies do with anything that comes near their face. So she tasted it, and it seemed some light went on in her little brain that said "hey...food is GOOD...I can totally eat this stuff!" and proceeded to launch herself towards the spoon with both hands and mouth open. So I guess she was indeed ready for solid food. Suddenly the highlight of thanksgiving was not the delicious turkey but watching Piper getting bright orange sweet potatoes all over herself, the table, and anyone sitting near her.

So the baby just woke up, I was actually nursing her when I started typing this on the I-pad, somehow during which she managed to drop off a full hour before she usually does. Not wanting to look the old gift horse in the mouth I scurried into the kitchen to eat another bowl of the green chili pinto beans we had for dinner. And I was just putting another glorious mouthful into my mouth, relishing the sound of my own self chewing and thinking "those yogurt commercials are no joke, all of those women getting gacked out over yogurt must be moms!" When the baby started crying and was soon brought by my husband into the kitchen.
I cannot say at that particular moment I was terribly happy to see them. I was also not happy when he sort of looked sheepishly offended when I asked if I could be alone for a few moments and he chose to go into the living room where I could still hear every cry and reassuring word, when all I wanted to do was listen to was the water heater and myself chewing for a few more minutes! Five minutes of relative silence! Is that to much to ask? These days, I realize it kinda is...but none the less he must have picked up my psychic cue (or maybe just looked at my face)because when she started crying again he took her to her room where I quickly heard the muffled sounds of baby Einstein...and she starts fussing a few minutes later and heeeerrrrre he is again....sigh. Deeeeepppp breathhhhsss....

Thankfully he did offer to change her diaper, which he does often...but I need to return to her care.My five minutes in Heaven is up. Till later, may all you moms out there enjoy your fermented milk products with reckless abandon.